3 years, 66 lives saved.

This was 3 years ago today. And with this sweet kitty, I stumbled into what has been one of the most positive experiences of my life -- cat and kitten fostering. I have never felt more needed, more valued, more loved than I do when I look into the eyes of the sweet kitties with whom I share my home for their brief moments of need. And I never feel more fulfilled than when one of my babies goes home forever with a loving family.

I could not speak more highly of the community of cat people with whom I work at Furkids Animal Rescue and Shelters. I am so grateful that God used Sunflower (aka Panther, pictured below) to lead me to Furkids and to my favorite hobby -- saving lives.

My fostering stats: 3 years, 66 lives saved.

-mo

learning

that there is never a time to let down one's guard.
that even the best of friends are judgmental at times.
that being 100% will not be acceptable.
that my role to play is to play a role.
that relationships are freaking hard.
-mo

stepping out

7 years and 1 month, almost to the day, after I had my first meeting with Dr. Robert Moore as his newly hired GRA, I walked out of the Andrew Young School (AYS) on my last day as an employee there. I am changed and so grateful. In 2008, I was a 23-year-old MPA student still with very little idea what I wanted in life.  Dr. Moore and others at AYS guided me through learning about myself and my world and discovering the calling God has placed on my life of being an economist who shares the hope of Jesus with the developing world.

I am especially grateful to Dr. Moore, who has been my boss and mentor throughout these 7 years. He has held me to a standard of academic excellence while always encouraging me to dream big and follow God's heart.

I am also thankful to my family and friends, who have borne the burden of hearing all my stories of triumph and failure and have unwaveringly supported me throughout.

Love y'all. So excited to continue on this amazing journey of pursuing Jesus with you.
-mo

My ordinary hour glass

LSU grad student Katie Joy Crawford created a series of self portraits to describe her struggle with anxiety. (Article here: http://www.11alive.com/story/news/nation-now/2015/05/20/photography-anxiety-disorder-self-portraits-katie-crawford/27651345/)

Not all of the photos resonate with my experience, but Photo #4, pasted above, is exactly how I feel most of the time.

Like time itself is crashing down on me, drowning me, captivating me. All the while, I know I am running out of it and I need to be fighting to break free of it. But unable to sense anything other than the claustrophobic entrapment of the hour glass and the debilitating pressure of its falling sand.

Outside my hour glass, time ticks freely, unknowingly, surrounding my captivity, unable to see me through the walls of my ordinary hour glass.

Almighty God of Love

Sunday, we sang the lyrics "We welcome you with praise! We welcome you with praise! Almighty God of Love, be welcomed in this place!"

Almighty God of Love. What a perfectly astounding name for our God. He is All Mighty. He can do or be anything He desires. And His deepest desire is love.  The God who is Almighty chooses love.

Almighty God of Love, help me daily to choose to devote my limited might to the same purpose you have chosen for your all might. Help me love.
-mo

The Book of Eli

This is the second time I have seen this movie. The first time was the night before my life would change forever. My heart is sentimentally heavy as I watch tonight. It's not the best movie ever, but it will always be the movie I watched the night before my life changed forever.

The first time I saw this movie was the evening of January 16, 2010. My best friend and I went out for the evening to spend quality time together before I would leave on January 17 for my first trip to Liberia. My first trip to West Africa. My first trip to the developing world. My first international trip since surrendering my heart and life to God's calling.

When I was in 6th grade, I first knew God was calling me to serve him internationally. I remember waking up in the middle of the night strongly impressed that God was asking me to go to China to share Jesus with the people there. At that age, I was terrified of flying, and I remember sitting in the living room with my dad and bawling for several minutes before I could even catch my breath to tell him what was wrong. When I finally could speak, my only words were "I don't want to go to China." As I regained composure, I was able to describe to Daddy the calling I was sensing. We talked things through, and I was finally able to sleep.

But I said no.

I failed to follow God's call.

I went instead to Philadelphia that summer with my church youth group. We had two flat tires on the way to Philly, and I remember the driver turning around and making a joke about Jonah and the storm God put in his path as he ran from his calling. The joke was not funny to me. I knew I was Jonah. I don't know if I am literally the cause of the flat tires, but I will never forget the lesson God taught me with those tires.

The next several years, I was free of the burden of the call. I all but forgot about it. Perhaps God was waiting until I proved trustworthy to reissue the call.

At just the right time, the reissue happened.  Out of a lemonade machine at Chick Fil A, God spoke. Have I written about that experience here before? It was and is so real. I consider that machine my burning bush. I was an employee at CFA and had just taken an order. I turned to fill a cup with lemonade and clearly heard God speak, calling me again to go.  It was such strange timing. I had not been thinking about spiritual things at all. I was just doing my job, and boom. There God was. I imagine Moses felt similarly when he was just watching his sheep and all of a sudden was being called out from a burning bush.

And I said yes.

I decided to follow God's call.

I signed up to go with West Africa Crossroads Corporation to Liberia.  On January 16, 2010, the old me saw The Book of Eli at Regal Atlantic Station with Amanda. On January, 17, 2010, the old me boarded a plane to Liberia, where on January 18, 2010, the old me became a new me.

I like this movie.
-mo

Unjumped Chips

A life-size game of checkers.
But there is no king.
Never the option to move back.
Whatever chips are left unjumped will remain.
They remain unopened doors,
unexplored options.
They will always be could haves,
some of them should haves.
But there is no king.
Never the option to move back.